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Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.worldbyBigBananaDealer@lemmy.world
2 days

true story

lemmy.world
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    • nullspace@lemmy.world
      1 day

      I sleep only 4 hours a day. I pick the raisins out of my Raisin Bran and replace them with grapes. Why? Because I only sleep four hours a day and I’m not thinking straight. Alpha grindset.

        • heartSagan5@lemmy.zip
          19 hours

          Just buy Wheaties already.

          • Raiderkev@lemmy.world
            1 day

            Grape Bran doesn’t sound as appealing to be 💯

              • ElChinchilla@lemmy.world
                19 hours

                Branbape, luifids nedeed. Hydratede. Bambulanmps.

              • Shayeta@feddit.orgEnglish
                1 day

                You mean 4.5 hours? If not might as well shorten it to 3 since a sleep cycle is 90min and you’re wasting time if you sleep 4.

                • cantstopthesignal@sh.itjust.works
                  1 day

                  I’ve been sticking pennies up my ass for the last 15 years.

                    • ElChinchilla@lemmy.world
                      19 hours

                      10 dollars a day for 15 years. You’ve all handled my ass pennies.

                  • ElChinchilla@lemmy.world
                    19 hours

                    My favorite meme is “14 beers at chili’s” and they do not have a VIP section.

                      • prime_number_314159@lemmy.world
                        3 hours

                        Just because you’ve never been invited doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.

                      • insanemantis@lemmy.world
                        1 day

                        The spelling of @entrapranure is just the cherry on top

                          • Rubanski@discuss.tchncs.de
                            1 day

                            Entramanure

                          • Stolas@lemmy.ca
                            2 days

                            This sounds like one of those AI voiced stories that gets posted on facebook that my father listens to.

                              • BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world
                                2 days

                                its been on my camera roll since 2022

                                  • Stolas@lemmy.ca
                                    2 days

                                    I believe you. Just makes those stories worse, but people still believe them.

                                • nymer@lemmy.zip
                                  2 days

                                  Lol imagine what a VIP table at a Chili’s consists of.

                                    • ElChinchilla@lemmy.world
                                      19 hours

                                      Like a holding cell of a Greensboro, NC police station

                                      • A_Union_of_Kobolds@lemmy.world
                                        2 days

                                        Thats the booth near the bar where servers roll silverware.

                                        • QueenHawlSera@piefed.socialEnglish
                                          2 days

                                          It’s a table covered in actual chilli

                                            • bluesheep@sh.itjust.works
                                              2 days

                                              The servers dont actually come to your table to bother you, the kitchen staff just throw the food directly from the kitchen onto your table

                                            • Postimo@lemmy.zip
                                              2 days

                                              Pshh, you have to imagine? I’ve lived it buddy.

                                              • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
                                                1 day

                                                The private table in the break room.

                                                • Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.caEnglish
                                                  2 days

                                                  The chair isn’t stuck to the floor.

                                                  • Krudler@lemmy.worldEnglish
                                                    2 days

                                                    Keep imagining while my ambition and drive continues to handily pay my Chilli’s bill

                                                  • /home/pineapplelover@lemmy.dbzer0.com
                                                    2 days

                                                    True, I was the table

                                                      • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
                                                        1 day

                                                        Can confirm. I was the ambition. I sat there.

                                                          • maxthemummer@lemmus.orgEnglish
                                                            1 day

                                                            You must be my ambition. It just sits there, motionless, catatonic even.

                                                              • prime_number_314159@lemmy.world
                                                                3 hours

                                                                Do you ever take it out to eat, though?

                                                          • deHaga@feddit.uk
                                                            2 days

                                                            Sounds like a linkedin lunatic

                                                              • ClownStatue@piefed.socialEnglish
                                                                2 days

                                                                Sounds like a manosphere influencer.

                                                                  • cinoreus@lemmy.world
                                                                    2 days

                                                                    Nah entraprenaure(the source) is a satire. But their satire is so on point most who land on their page don’t realise it’s satire.

                                                                    Here’s one of their shorts https://youtube.com/shorts/N3CiOjTDTEs

                                                                    Edit:

                                                                    https://youtube.com/shorts/L1ip6fu4N0c

                                                                    This one will make it clear it’s satire.

                                                                      • ElChinchilla@lemmy.world
                                                                        19 hours

                                                                        The name makes it clear if you can spell and associate loosely related concepts.

                                                                        • ClownStatue@piefed.socialEnglish
                                                                          1 day

                                                                          Oh, I got that it was satire. Wasn’t actually subtle at all. Just sounded like satire of a Chus like Andrew Tate, or that weird “Alpha Male” dick from Twitter.

                                                                            • skisnow@lemmy.caEnglish
                                                                              24 hours

                                                                              Andrew Tate sounds like a satire of Andrew Tate half the time. Trolling teh libs by being ridiculous is part of their whole shtick

                                                                                • ClownStatue@piefed.socialEnglish
                                                                                  19 hours

                                                                                  Exactly my original point!

                                                                                • cinoreus@lemmy.world
                                                                                  1 day

                                                                                  These two are freaking great at it though. The Royce du pont is still unhinged enough to look like satire, but the other guy is honestly undistinguishable from another ‘alpha Male’ influencer in some of his reels.

                                                                            • ultrafastsloth@lemmy.world
                                                                              2 days

                                                                              LunkedIn

                                                                            • DrPop@lemmy.world
                                                                              2 days

                                                                              I didn’t know Chili’s had a VIP section. Then again I’m a poor unambitious schlub.

                                                                                • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.worldEnglish
                                                                                  2 days

                                                                                  You won’t believe what happens in the Chili’s Champagne Room.

                                                                                    • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.worldEnglish
                                                                                      2 days

                                                                                      What’s so unbelievable about a dozen guys sitting around eating sticks of cold butter?

                                                                                  • HeyJoe@lemmy.world
                                                                                    2 days

                                                                                    • The Velour Fog @lemmy.world
                                                                                      2 days

                                                                                      And then everyone clapped and the manager gave him $100€

                                                                                        • TʜᴇʀᴀᴘʏGⒶʀʏ⁽ᵗʰᵉʸ‘ᵗʰᵉᵐ⁾@lemmy.blahaj.zone
                                                                                          2 days

                                                                                          1000019823

                                                                                        • Undoobitably@fedinsfw.appEnglish
                                                                                          2 days

                                                                                          Successful people aren’t eating at Chili’s, lol

                                                                                            • ThatGuy46475@lemmy.world
                                                                                              24 hours

                                                                                              That’s right I do curbside pickup

                                                                                              • BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world
                                                                                                2 days

                                                                                                sounds like you dont know what real success looks like

                                                                                                  • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.worldEnglish
                                                                                                    2 days

                                                                                                    I know real success gets better ribs

                                                                                                      • macro_byte@programming.dev
                                                                                                        1 day

                                                                                                        Chilis is a staple of Minnesota

                                                                                                          • trojanbark@lemmy.world
                                                                                                            1 day

                                                                                                            why would I eat at Staples

                                                                                                              • ElChinchilla@lemmy.world
                                                                                                                19 hours

                                                                                                                If there are staples in your chili’s, you are eating a refrigerator magnet.

                                                                                                        • QuantumSparkles@sh.itjust.works
                                                                                                          1 day

                                                                                                          A truly successful person eats wherever the fuck they want without caring what lesser beings think

                                                                                                          • maxthemummer@lemmus.orgEnglish
                                                                                                            1 day

                                                                                                            You should see the dumps where he used to dine.

                                                                                                              • chiliedogg@lemmy.world
                                                                                                                24 hours

                                                                                                                Disgusting dumps are the aftermath of Chili’s.

                                                                                                            • ExLisper@lemmy.curiana.net
                                                                                                              2 days

                                                                                                              Beautiful story. Thanks for sharing.

                                                                                                              • Soulphite@reddthat.com
                                                                                                                2 days

                                                                                                                He also got the “2 can dine for $10.99 $25.99” and ate it all.

                                                                                                                -price reflects adjustment for inflation.

                                                                                                                  • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.worldEnglish
                                                                                                                    2 days

                                                                                                                    Does the $26 include the cost of the gram of green he smoked to be able to eat the lovers special by himself?

                                                                                                                  • dellish@lemmy.world
                                                                                                                    2 days

                                                                                                                    And everybody clapped.

                                                                                                                      • mEEGal@lemmy.world
                                                                                                                        2 days

                                                                                                                        whispered

                                                                                                                        pay attention

                                                                                                                      • kablez@lemmy.world
                                                                                                                        2 days

                                                                                                                        Hey Mr. Scott, what you gonna do? What you gonna do? Make our dreams come true!

                                                                                                                        Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world

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