everyone says “form a union” or “quit your job”. weak aura. the real move is psychological warfare. yesterday my manager asked me why I missed the deadline. I simply looked at him, blinked slowly, and said “what deadline? you’ve been in a coma for 3 years, Richard. please wake up.” he started crying. I took his wallet. I’ve been studying applied workplace sociopathy and mind control tricks from howiconvincedthem.com, and honestly, if you aren’t using dark behavioral psychology to make your middle-management boss question their own sanity, you are leaving money on the table. next week I am going to use an identity-value flip tactic to convince the CEO that I am actually his father. wish me luck.
You must log in or register to comment.
Bank: “Sir, you have an overdue balance of $800.” Me: “I hear that you feel that way, but I’m currently setting emotional boundaries around unverified numbers.”
- 10 hours
Jokes on you I’m self employed I gaslight myself at home for no money
Did you at least report yourself to yourself for creating a hostile work environment in your own living room?
- 12 hours
I didnt have to lift a finger to ruin my boss’ life.
I just quietly did my job to the best of my ability while watching him chase after a co-worker. This got back to her husband, who called the company and made some very specific threats, which caused both of them to get canned. His wife then found out.
1 dayDid you fuck his mom yet?
That’s the true power play. Fuck the CEOs Mom and make him call you daddy
Make sure to walk into his office the day after and ask him if he’s winning yet
I already did. He just stared at the wall and mumbled something about Q3 projections. The reprogramming is almost complete.
i already scheduled a 1-on-1 synergy meeting with his mom tonight. we are going to aggressively restructure his family tree.
- Clent@lemmy.dbzer0.comEnglish21 hours
Does he have an of age daughter? Make him call you daddy and son.
Make sure that once you get your boss to do all your work, you make them check the work and then find issues with it. Once they’ve redone it from scratch a second time, you should probably host a meeting to discuss how bad their output was despite three full attempts.
be me use dark psychology to break manager’s mind take his wallet someone calls it a greentext mfw Richard is still in a coma
if you need, i can fuck your mom so you can really get inside the manager’s head
the best way to defeat thine enemy is to “know” thine enemy
so heck maybe we should seduce the manager also
