I’m not OP but FWIW as someone who hasn’t necessarily had the most pleasant life and is ND I can try and add a little more context as to why that might not be comforting. Especially for someone that may be neurodivergent.
In short platitudes like that are basically just a secular statement of “thoughts and prayers”. It often seems like it is more for the speakers benefit so that that they don’t have to actually engage with the lived reality of the person they are talking to. I can’t speak for all neurodivergent people, but my mind works based on probabilities and evidence.
When someone says to me that they know I’ll find success after I open up about something that I have been struggling with for ten or twenty years, my immediate response (if I decide to ignore the social script) is to interrogate that statement. Where will I find success? When? Who do I need to talk to? Obviously they don’t actually know and telling me that is ultimately being dismissive of my experience. If they have genuine help they can offer there is rarely nothing more that I want, but it’s even more rare that anyone actually has either the ability or the willingness to help. In that situation I just want them to recognize and acknowledge my existence and to sit with and share that discomfort.
TL;DR If you can’t actually help, just witness them.
I’m not OP but FWIW as someone who hasn’t necessarily had the most pleasant life and is ND I can try and add a little more context as to why that might not be comforting. Especially for someone that may be neurodivergent.
In short platitudes like that are basically just a secular statement of “thoughts and prayers”. It often seems like it is more for the speakers benefit so that that they don’t have to actually engage with the lived reality of the person they are talking to. I can’t speak for all neurodivergent people, but my mind works based on probabilities and evidence.
When someone says to me that they know I’ll find success after I open up about something that I have been struggling with for ten or twenty years, my immediate response (if I decide to ignore the social script) is to interrogate that statement. Where will I find success? When? Who do I need to talk to? Obviously they don’t actually know and telling me that is ultimately being dismissive of my experience. If they have genuine help they can offer there is rarely nothing more that I want, but it’s even more rare that anyone actually has either the ability or the willingness to help. In that situation I just want them to recognize and acknowledge my existence and to sit with and share that discomfort.
TL;DR If you can’t actually help, just witness them.